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Most of us grew up with a distorted image of ourselves, based around our external influences such as culture, family, friends, school, society, medias narratives, conditioning and programming.
Eating disorders develop, distortion of what we actually look like when looking in the mirror occurs & mental health challenges form because we don’t see what the external world tells us is beautiful, normal or popular.
For myself, I struggled with my weight, freckles, nose, cellulite, saggy skin, grey hair, breasts, thighs… the list goes on.
My inner narrative was that of self-hatred and disgust. It has taken me 38 years to feel comfortable in my body, to love and accept myself as I am. Do I still see things that bother me? Yes! But, I don’t dwell in it or let it stop me from living a much more peaceful & fulfilling life. I see it as it is and I continue on my day. Just like thoughts passing by. If we grab them and anchor ourselves into them, it's a slippery downward spiral. When I observe different aspects of myself & my body now, I observe it, accept it and focus my energy on the next part of my day. I interrupt the potential for a narrative. I intercept the pathway.
Here are some of the ways I have found to be super helpful for healing your body image and relationship to your body:
Tip #1 - Mirror Work
Seeing yourself each morning
Giving yourself a high five, smile or thumbs up
Dancing in front of the mirror with yourself / put on music / have fun
Focus on the areas you struggle with and try to change the narrative, try to see beauty, try to find acceptance
It doesn’t mean we don’t continue to work on ourselves. What it means is that in order to change, we first must accept the present moment and accept ourselves exactly where we are and for who we are. Only then, true lasting growth can occur.
Tip #2 - Self-Care
Eat whole nutritious foods, in season, for your body type, that feel good and sustains you energetically
Do exercise you enjoy, not forcing something you don’t even want to do, make it more fun, do what works for you & change it up sometimes to make it more interesting
Loving kindness & compassion for yourself
Have a spiritual practice to help you stay conscious, aware and in the present moment
Good sleep
Daily rituals & acts of self-love, pleasure & relaxation
Supportive, aligned relationships
Tip #3 - Having a Spiritual Connection/Practice
Expanding your lens to a wider angle and height/having a broader universal perspective
Moving out of little self into spiritual self/living as a unique embodiment of Source Consciousness
Connecting with the earth, natural elements, plants & animals
Having a belief system in something bigger than you that you can trust, have faith in and know you are loved, worthy, whole, abundant, guided , supported & never alone
Doing daily rituals or practices that connect you to your higher self, spirit & guides
Until I finally started believing in spirit, seeing myself as a unique expression of Light and truly connecting with nature and animals, I was lost, disconnected, alone. When I started to truly see myself as an expression of a higher consciousness, I started to see myself as I truly am. A unique, one-of-a-kind, spiritual being living a temporary human experience. And you are too. And everyone else. We are all connected, we are one and the same, but come with different perspectives & experiences. We are all divine sparks of light with infinite potential. We are all mirrors of each other in some way, shape or form. Owning our uniqueness is what we are here to do and owning our oneness & interconnectedness is equally important.
Everything is Spiritual. We just have to remember this universal truth.
Tip #4 - Meditations & Subconscious
Re-programming
Listening to or doing daily meditations
Sleep reprogramming with guided affirmations
The subconscious mind is where our imprint or impressions are stored from early childhood, past lives and traumatic experiences. This is where the ego or inner child operates from in a protective manor to keep you safe from harm so as to not repeat the trauma. This is the hidden or unseen realm which is tricky to access unless in a more meditative, hypnotic state or brain wave frequency. By listening to guided meditations, doing guided visualizations or subconscious reprogramming sleep affirmations, slowly over time you are replacing the old patterns and narratives with new patterns and narratives. This is how we create cognitive behavioural changes that last.
Keep at it. This is a slow and steady process. Stay hopeful, with faith and you will start to notice subtle changes in your energy over time.
There are endless options on Youtube for guided meditations, sleep meditations and subconscious reprogramming for sleep.
Tip #5 - Changing the Narrative / Re-patterning / Affirmations
Daily affirmations (repetition) - see some suggestions below
EFT – Emotional Freedom Technique, is a powerful tool to work through your fears, mental and emotional programming, to release emotions & change your inner dialogue. To help with anxiety, fears, worry, stress, depression & deeper love, awareness & acceptance of yourself and your body. You can find YouTube videos on this to learn the process or find a specialist in your area or online.
Creating a new narrative – new story – new pattern to replace the old, even if you feel like an imposter. Keep trying until you actually change your thoughts and beliefs.
*I AM beautiful just as I AM.
*I AM a unique embodiment of source.
*I deeply and completely love and accept myself.
*I love and honour my body as a sacred vessel.
*I AM whole, worthy and loved, just as I AM.
You can make an audio recording with these affirmations and listen to them every morning. Or, you can place them on sticky notes and repeat them when doing your morning mirror work.
Tip #6 - Journalling / Self-Reflection
Keep a journal to reflect on your narratives, to write out your thoughts and connect deeper with yourself. Even if the thoughts are negative, write them down and look at them. Express yourself, just get it all out on paper. This is a way to observe your thoughts and continue working with yourself to change any narratives that are not serving you.
Write out all the things you love about yourself & your body
Write a daily gratitude list for what your body does well for you, an appreciation for the magnificent vessel that it is. What all it does to keep you healthy and functioning in this life.
Write to your body. Build rapport. Deepen your relationship. Tune in and listen. Do regular body scans and write down what you feel, hear, think & observe.
Tip #7 - Turning your attention to other areas of life that are going well, that you love & enjoy
What aspects of life light you up and make you forget about time? What brings you into flow?
Get creative / express and share your energy / play more / relax more
I remember when I was younger, I moved to the mountains for work. I had great friends, loved my job and was enjoying life. I was overweight, but it was the first time in my life I didn’t worry about it so much. I felt accepted for me and I had confidence because other areas of my life were in a good flow. This is when the weight just started falling away, yes I was exercising a little, my eating habits hadn’t changed, but my mental and emotional self was more at peace.
When we try to force something, it means we are in resistance to the natural flow of life. Sometimes the ego is in fear and puts up a wall, which we do have to breakthrough, but I’m talking about a lack of acceptance here. When we accept where we are, and who we are, we can then move forward. If we anchor ourselves into too much resistance, we don’t budge. There needs to be some give and that gives comes from acceptance in order for energy to flow. The ego doesn’t want to accept, it wants to protect.
Remember, this is a slow and steady journey. It’s not an overnight race. Small steps each day go a long way over time. It is sustainability, transformation & integration over time that brings deep, lasting change, growth & fulfillment.
YOU GOT THIS!
If I can do it, you can do it too.
And if you need support with your healing journey, connect with me, I would love to walk the path alongside you.
~ Namaste. Aloha. SO MUCH LOVE ~
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